


Awake

by 401



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Nightmare, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-18
Updated: 2015-11-18
Packaged: 2018-05-02 06:11:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5237366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/401/pseuds/401





	Awake

Bucky peeled his t-shirt over his head and tossed it sharply into the corner of the room, raking his fingers through his damp with still-trembling hands before slumping back against the headboard. His heart was a metronome in his throat and his palms, like the rest of him, were glossed in sweat. Bucky squeezed his eyes closed to block the shadows on the walls. They had started to warp and flex independently, crawling over the familiar walls like spiders up a tree-trunk.

Steve stirred next to him, shifting onto his side and pressing his head into Bucky’s thigh, wrapping one strong arm around his middle and snoring quietly into the fabric of Bucky’s sweatpants. The soldier felt his heart calm a little, but not enough.

Nights like this were all too frequent. The nights when the nightmares would take a devilishly independent turn, the thresholds between awake and asleep would become dangerously blurry and his ability to compose himself afterwards failed miserably. When he was alone in the house, it was almost easier. He could shout and throw and cry his way through the fog of memories as much as he needed to, but when Steve was here, content and asleep, the thought of breaking down completely scared him almost as much as the dreams.

“You awake, Buck?” Steve’s voice was muffled and hoarse with sleep.

Bucky took a breath in through his nose and squeezed Steve’s shoulder in response, not trusting his voice to not give in as soon as he spoke.

“You’re sad,” Steve mumbled, lifting his head up clumsily after a few moments, “Tell me.”

Bucky shook his head, forcing a small smile and guiding Steve’s head back to his lap. Steve resisted, sitting up and wrapping his arms around Bucky’s middle before pulling him down to the bed. He pressed his nose to the back of his neck, shivering as the tendrils of long, dark hair shrouded his face.

“Jesus, Buck,” Steve sighed, tightening his arms, “You’re shaking.”

Bucky nodded in silence, shuffling closer into the hollow of Steve’s arms. The Captain’s breath was gentle and regular against the side of his neck, coming in cooling gusts over the hot skin.

“We don’t have to talk about it unless you need to,” Steve reassured, feeling the tension in Bucky’s sides increase, “I do want you to try and get some more sleep though.”  


Bucky stopped and thought. He didn’t know what time it was, three or four am at least. The last few nights had been a poor excuse for sleep, more catnaps whenever his brain let him, never more than a couple of hours at a time. It was taking its toll, slowly but surely. Minor emotions were getting difficult to stifle, frustration at the smallest things would leave him on the verge of tears.

“I’m tired, Steve,” Bucky groaned, cuddling back even further into Steve’s warmth, “Everything hurts and I’m tired.”

Steve frowned, pushing kisses against Bucky’s shoulders and rubbing slowly.

“Why do you never wake me?” Steve sighed, “You sit up in a total mess and don’t let me comfort you properly.”  


Turned himself to face Steve, pressing their lips together to silence the Captain in the small space they had created between their bodies. The sheets were pulled high around their shoulders, blocking the room from view.

“You’re very pretty when you’re asleep,” Bucky shrugged, “Wouldn’t wanna’ spoil it.”

Steve chuckled into Bucky’s neck, before closing his eyes and letting the haze sleep cloud him. Bucky closed his too, content for the first time in days.

“I love you, Buck,” Steve whispered, “Don’t forget it.”

 


End file.
